nelly, i am heathcliff!

( All Happy Endings employees except Hayden )

( Will Collins )

Oh my god, you guys. I'm pretty sure I'm dying.

If that doesn't get your stupid attention, I don't know what will. Don't you know I'm sick of waiting?

No Heathcliff on that list. Fuck you, too, asshole!

You know what? Maybe having that list out isn't so bad. At least now people can't lie about who they are like they've been doing in the past, which is a really fucking shitty thing to do if you ask me. If you're a freak like the rest of us, the least you can do is own up to it, right? Don't be a drag, just be a queen, all that nauseating Gaga-inspirational bullshit. Don't hide it, kids. You were just born this way.

Like Dorothy was even that believable, anyway. Psychotic bitch.

Does someone want to explain to me why the fuck I busted out some Kate Bush in the middle of Michigan Ave just now? I don't even like that shitty song, and it's not like this is the goddamn Moors, either! And, more importantly, I didn't get paid for that little impromptu performance, which is just nine shades of wrong. Street-performing may be in my blood, but I'm not poor enough or desperate enough or stupid enough to do it where the rich bitches of Chicago can have me arrested for disturbing the peace. Nope, sorry, not happening. I don't do this shit for free.

But back to my original question. What the fuck is going on?!

( I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas; they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the colour of my mind. )